End of feb

Hey bloggers!
I want sure what to call this post and well that's all that i could come up with- its is 1am btw. THis times actually isnt too bad for me but still i should break that habit of staying up late haha am such a night owl!
Youth
Okay so youth group is finally up and running. It's really good this year, which is probabley too soon to say seeing as we've only had one meetin so far, but I mean like the organising is just excellent. I have been chosen as leader...haha thats sounds like some kind of dictatoshhip or something, that sentence, don't you think?? What I mean is, I and another old classmate have been chose as like youth leaders of the group, mainly because we've both just finished school and arnt moving on to Uni or anything this year. SO yeah its been real good, because we've been having like "leader" meetings lol and we've mangaed to plan like 3 weeks ahead of time, its great! To be honest I am finding it rather hard, cos Im not really a loud person, or am I like leader material (atleast thats what i think, ive been told by God and lots of other people, well otherwise) and yeah. Cos like at our first youth group meeting we were trying to organise games and well no-one was listening, there was just no respect..I found it quite idk offending. You know, like this generation is soo bad with respect, its horrific! So yeah this is a learning experiance for me, which I hope will bring the "leader-ness" (lol) right outta me. I would appreciate prayer btw :)
Engagement
Hahaha no Im not engaged! lol I just put that title to remind me of the engagement party I went to in the weekend. It was actually last years youth group leaders that became engaged! It was very lovely...but unfortunately alot of things went down. Im not going to go hugely into detail (that wouldnt be fair) but it would be safe to say that I learnt personally from attending this. You see Im completely opposed to drinking (as in alcohol) as I've seen the effects first hand and I know what it can lead too etc. But unfortunately on this night i drank. Thank the Lord it was only a few, but the guilt i felt afterwards was pretty big. I guess I just saw that everyone else (Christian and non Christian) were having a few and so I caved. Grr im really annoyed at myself, not only cos i lowered my standards (atleast I think thats what my standards are..heck im annoyed Im so "double-minded" on the matter also) but i also did this in front of minors who attend youth group. I mean heck, what is that showing them! Ughhh ...
Could you girls please pray for me?? or even leave me some advice? I really would appreciate it!
well think ill leave it at that for now.

update lol

Hey everyone! how are you all? So I made it my priority to update this as I just havnt in ages! It's really bad of me..i guess i just have been either too busy or too lazy to go on this...Im thinking more latter but a bit of both. Well today and my family went on a day trip to Alexander. It's a lovely little town that goes to extremes temperature wise, in both summer and winter. And so because its summer here i def expected the heat. And boy did we get it.. Was like 33 degrees! Which is alot especially for us, as lately our weather in my town has been pretty pitiful. Ah well! I enjoyed the heat today, it meant ice cream and touching up on my tan :D There was also another form of heat that wasnt so tasteful should i say..my temper. Today was definately another wake-up call for my erm character. Lately Gods showing me some ugly sides of me and it hasnt been pleasant. Today was def one of those days, when I could really see that I'm not perfect..well obvs not..but yeah. You see I can be very selfish, demanding, and impatient. Today i'm pretty sure I did nothing but complain and grumble about how we're wasting time doing this, and we're late for this..etc etc. Ughh i just hate that about myself! Funny thing is however (and btw Im not judging, just merely commenting) is that my dad and my youngest brother are exactly the same (Oh God have mercy, send us an outpouring Lord! Please!!) So today was a great day of butting heads-yay! I really do need a change in me, believe me i see the log in my own eye! I mean how am i supposed to cope in our family ministry if i cannot bear to be around them..i dont like being like this. I wish i was more like my brother James sometimes. He's got a gentle spirit, and just sits and smiles all the time. Sigh!
So yes atm things have been pretty difficult. Another thing is that I've been real keen to just go places, (mayby my age has something to do with it also..) like travel and well get out of town ya know! And i've been real struggling with the truths of this ministry and the fact we'll be all over the place, almost every country in the world...but for some mad reason, my heart has idk..taken it in, and Im still yearning to get out, even though i know right now, this is the "sitting in the waiting room" place...yeesh there goes my inpatient-ness again huh? Like its been hard aye. I'm thinking it certainly doesnt help when friends of mine who are not understanding of this at all....how do i say...It's like I have this huge dream of my life and its big and exciting..but i cannot really share it cos people dont believe you, or they imagine it their own way..and it sucks!
God has big plans! We are living in the last days, expect to see ginormous things happen people! We arnt just gonna be raptured without leaving a mark on this world. As barlow girl says "We are a million voices, breaking silence til...THEY'LL REMEMBER WE WERE HERE!!" Guys whats happening now, is just a period of darkness. Dont lose hope..i really ought to take my own advise hahaha! can you guys pray for me please..thanks! And so people even if this is a real weird blog, (i kinda start off slighly emo-ish and then end up leaving like a pep talk lol) just yeah keep at it. If theres things in your life getting you down, pray hard! And please i urge you to pray for the biggest revival the world has ever seen. Check out Isaiah60 and Acts 2!. Gods word does not return void! believe in the latter glory!! peace out.