an update from me

So its been like half a month since i last wrote which actually isnt that long for me, but noticing the blogs i follow who update like every two days, i thought id better do the same.
idea
So ive decided to put little labels at the top of each paragraph, or sentence in this case as i tend to write a whole lotta stuff at once which doesnt really make sense :(
School
well okay so i thought school was over after i had my last exam (history, just so you know and dont even ask me how that went :/) but then i was asked to come back to school to complete a assessment for Statistics, which thank the LOrd I got merit and then also to see my history teacher who then told me that i hadn't handed in all that i was supposed to for one of my internals (like assessment, assignment thing) like i had overlooked an entire page...so sigh thats what Im doing now and its very difficult, you'd think there'd be heaps more info on the Womens Vote (my country was first to get it btw :D) but nope hardly anything. SO yeah we seniors finished like 3 weeks ago now and the juniors (including my lil bros) finish next week.i was kinda hoping to be chilling and relaxing (without my lil bros) by now, its like i might aswell be at school sigh! but oh well just like a few more days and it should all be over! so thats my rant bout school lol
Music
well im just really loving music right now, i just cant get enough of it. atm Im listening (on my pod)to Kutless -HEarts of the Innocent , its on shuffle btw and im also multitasking and listening to samples of Sara Groves new albums Fireflies and Songs. (which you can find on her website) and yeah am really loving it. I've never really listend to her before to be honest, but when i heard the title of her album, well who could ignore it (it truelly screams out SUMMER) and its making me pretty excited even if we have had like a week of rain :( its getting me prepared :). I also am quite liking jazz/blues like think Norah Jones stuff atm too so last night i looked up Christian jazz and found an alternative by the name of Ginny Owens and seriously you should check her out. Her voice is amazing and it's also really cool cos like she was born blind, and its just real neat to see how she hasnt let that stop her ya know, not that being blind stops you from singing- but yall know what i mean lol. ok also really like the theme song for that new movie The Time Travelers Wife (not sure if ill watch it or not, like i love romance films but it's gotta be decent ya know) but anyway the song is by Lifehouse and its called Broken. It's such a beautiful song. btw if peeps know much about that movie, like maybs you've seen it then please let me know and also what do you all think about Lifehouse, are they good? (cos ive only listened to that one song and i did google them and it said that the lead was Christian, but yeah) ??
my walk
okay so with the stress of everything round me lately its been so hard to try and keep my relationship with God on track. But like in saying that i still make time for internet and stupedly watched like a ton of tv recently and i just hate how i do that. like okay so yesterday right my whole day was devoted to this history thing but then like i still ended up watching Ellen and Coro and its like grrr i coulda used that time to spend in the Word or in like worship ya know. I hate how i always let my flesh win lately, ya know, like it never used to be that way ya know. so yeah and lately like heck i just had/have this huge like bitterness toward my mum, like i just feel like shes keeping me wrapped in cottonwool ya know and heck i know deep down she loves me and just wants to protect but yeah i guess with like all my classmates going off in other places like uni and what not and ive chosen to stay here partly cos theres no place that i could actually go and i know Gods like def got plans in this place, but yeah still i just grrr like got this rebellion issue or something...sigh i hate it sometimes ya know. 

But yeah on a brighter note, i was watching benny hinn and he was teachign about getting into the presense of God. and it was really interesting and it def works (ya just gotta stick to it like everyday, unlike my self). anyway so he was teaching from the book of Numbers chapt 7 (its long but got amazing truths) and anyway he's talking about how theres like three realms to the presence of God the first realm is the "outer courts" and this is where most people including myself go in our prayer life. This is the one that coincides with the verse "let your requests be known to God - i think thats Phils or Ephesian, sorry not sure from top of my head. but yeah this is when you like talk, and you yourself only talk, ya know you pray about the day, for you unsaved bro etc etc and yeah theres no waiting on God or time to let HIm talk ya know. and so like in this part you'll also have a ton of distraction and spiritual warfare and what not. 

And so what Benny was getting at is that we should stay and keep going, dont just walk away at this point cos then you're just continue that same pattern day after day and you'll just keep living a mundane (it think thats the word) life, which we shouldnt want lol. So after you're talking part its time to wait, and you're thinking wait for what? and im telling you wait for God and His amazing presence. 

And btw this can take like an hour from when you've started ya know. He did say however that once you get into it reguarly then, God will just show up like WHAM lol. But yeah so you gotta enter in the inner courts, and btw God will "tease" you lol He'll give you a taste and then He'll draw back and this is like the scripture 'Taste and see that the Lord is good..' and sorry not sure where this from, probs Psalms but not sure. but yeah Benny likens this to like a zoo where the worker is trying to get the animal into it's cage and so takes a piece of meat which it tastes and then wants more and so the worker takes steps back and lets it taste again until the worker keeps going back and the animal is led to the cage. (btw please dont think that i think we're like animals or something k, but i trust yall mature to read that i mean this figuratvely :)) and this is because once we've had a taste of God we want more and so He keeps teasing us tehe. 

And btw this second realm is like Psalm 42 and Psalm 63 ( which i trust yous will read lol) and yeah so like our goal is the third realm which is called in Numbers "the holy of Holies' and only after like several days or so, will we reach this realm, its like about persistance ya know (heck i myself have got to get into this!).
SO yeah hope that makes sense, just holla back lol but yeah the one day i tried it, it seriously was awesome and God willing ill get back into it again. but like yeah in the 1st realm i like def had sooo much distraction but i like just kept using scriptures like James 4v8 which reads "Draw near to God and He'll draw near to you" and like i p much just said i wasnt leaving till i got something lol as weird as that sounds, but yeah def just do it peeps and ill endeaver to do the same ...hopefully.

anyway this p long, i thought this would be a lot quicker, wish i could type faster!
ooo JesusCultue just came on my pod, they are real cool! check them out lol.
well better hit my pillow (as in sleep lol) gotta get into school tomorrow cos need help with history, btw if anyone knows anything about Kate Sheppard could you p pleasse let me know, pref in next few days!
God bless kids!
H xx