Magnificent May

Holla!
So here i am doing my monthly update! Outside it is pouring down with rain :) and I quite like it. So its been an interesting month. Quite an enjoyable one to be honest :)
So at the moment I am officially a bum (meaning Im doin nothing lol). No I didnt get fired..not yet anyway just kidding! You see a few weeks ago I went to stay at my bros house, cos he needed a hand, as my sister-in-law went to hospital (thank Jesus she's algood now) and on the first night i was there, I had an accident. You see I was just about ready to cut the pumpkins and so i asked my older bro for a sharp knife. Instead he took over (obviously thought his little sister couldnt do it :p) and then once pumpkin was all chopped up, he pretented to cut me with the knife. But instead of it stopping just before getting my hand, it carried on and left a lovely effect on my right index finger. My bro felt soooo bad aye! There was blood everywhere. Dont worry though it not too major. It did go partway through a tendon though and so i not able able to work for three weeks...hense me mentioning that I'm now a bum lol I am thankfully covered by ACC (its like a benefit kinda thing) so yeah its been pretty sweet to be honest :)
I never really know what to put in this blogs aye. To me they dont seem at all very interesting. hmmmm
Well last month I did say I would put pics of lovely random things so I will endeaver to do that. I also said I wasnt going to complain, so I'm not going to hehe
Ummmmm God is good :) He really is. It amazes me like how He puts up with me.(so this is kinda half a complaint lol) Like I'm just so like a sea thats been tossed to and fro, ya know, like I very much dislike how one day everythings great and then the next....well not so lovely. I guess I've just got to learn that us humans are prone to changing; but its okay as long as we always look to the one who never changes. God is the same yesterday, today and forever. He's forver merciful, yet just. Forever loving, forever wanting His children in His arms.
It's funny the other day I mentioned to my mum that my prayer of late is to just fully understand what Jesus went through on the cross. Like my desire is to know, to comprehend what He did for us, because of His great love for us. Mum wasnt too pleased. She thought that I wanted to suffer like He did. But I didnt mean that...well not really should i say...like it'd be awesome to suffer for Christ... but like I just want to better understand what Jesus had to go through, willingly, just for us...just for me :,( Does that make sense fellow bloggers? :) I wish to just know. :)
How great is our God, sing with me , How great is our God! How great, How great is our God! That is the chorus from a song by Chris Tomlin. One of my favourite songs in fact :) I put that here cos I just want to encourage you to find a place of solitude so you can soak in the great presence of God! Girls and guys , time with God is so sooo important. I know it can be hard sometimes. But dont give up, or give in should i say. Sometimes you wont feel like praying, or worshipping or getting into His Word but god never said it was gonna be easy. You may have to deny yourself, deny your feelings, and take up your cross and follow Him. Be encouraged dear friends. Jesus is there, He never left, He's there with open arms :)
Right here are some pictures :)Have a great start to June friends.
P.S I think this song may have influenced me a wee bit in my prayer life.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f2ZCIp0HiRo
Pss Im craving a coffee right now :) and these are indeed just random pics from my folder and from google images :) So atm looking at photos a guinea pigs on google (i used to have pet guinea pigs when i was a child) and am disgusted at the amount of pics showing cooked guinea pigs.....ughhhhhhh :( So sad!

April

Wow! this month has gone by soo quickly! I mean flip Mays just round the corner...then June! and then it'd be like half-way through 2010 already (btw do you peeps call it 'twenty ten' or "two thousand and ten"? Personally i go with the latter cos 'twenty ten's just weird lol) Anyway so at the beginning of the month it was easter and down my end it was amazing cos I attended Easter Camp woot woot!! (how'd you guys easter go? :) )
Anyway i really had a great time!! and thats pretty much what this post is gonna be about :). So yeah there were 46 of us Fairlie folk (which is huge for us!) that attending! It was a mixture of non-believers and believers that went and praise Jesus they all saw or felt His presense during it.. :D
Um not sure what i was gonna say now......Um....... Here its raining btw (just thought id throw that in lol hows the weather in the US?? (cos you guys are all from there) Sigh you'll be in Spring now..talk about bliss! :)
Hmm think I'll just talk about the last night of camp cos thats when i felt it was the best!!!!! So at the Big Top (which was the huge marquee that we went for the meetings-held in like 4000 peeps!) we were worshipping and the presense of God began to fall and i just couldnt stop shaking and it just didnt want to stop! it was wonderful :) but at the same time i was like God i think you can stop now lol its getting too much and im not really concentrating on the preacher...but it didnt until near the end, and then we had more worship and flip God just shook up our youth group. Peeps had been affected by the message (i wish i could remember it lol) and so those who responded were kindly asked to stand so then us leaders could go round and pray for them. And flip it was amzing. Like i was super stoked cos we'd pray for someone and like not really expecting anything to happen really, but then afterward they would be crying and i know tears arnt anything too major but it just shows how God can move. :)
Then things went awesome to awesomer lol You see after that i began to um how you say..have the "Holy Ghost" laughter and then like randomly (or God inspired should i say) this girl comes upto me and says "God just wanted me to tell you that He really loves you. He really loves you" and she just kept repeating this and it was pretty super! And then like i remember falling over and then i opened my eyes and saw a friend laughing at me/with me lol. What happened next was simply amazing and something that ive never had or experienced before. You see we ended up laughing heaps for a good 15mins and then i just felt like running and so i told me friend this and he's like "k lets run" and so we just bolted out the door and it was like the fastest run ive even been on (go Holy Spirit eh!) and then we just stopped and he led me back to the Big Top where i just couldnt stop shouting in tongues aye and the he began to shout too. I never heard anyone pray like that before and i later learned that he was interpreting my tongue! It was sooo amazing!! :D God is sooo good! Like he actual has the gift of interpreting tongues, its amazing!! But it wasnt over just yet!:D When we got to the marquee (not sure of spelling-like big circus tent lol) and i like began to prophesy (btw i didnt know this at the time, it was later when i recieved some er spiritual backlash that i learned this) and me and the friend were just working hand in hand, getting like er words for peeps and also just proclaiming the goodness and love of God, especially the love he had for particular people in our youth too :D amazing! So many others experienced the love and joy of Jesus too, like a dear friend of mine who was dancing in the Holy Spirit and a few others experienced freedom through deliverance etc. Was such an epic night! I loved it!
Unfortunately some others didnt enjoy it and a few leaders unfortunately didnt think it was a move of God. This has actually made it quite hard for me, as how can i serve in this youth group when there is disunity among the group. Sigh or should i even be in this youth group was a question i was pondering a few weeks ago. I eventually prayed and consulted my mum who said that this is good training ground for me, and she had a word from the Lord that "this youth group is only temporary" so thank Jesus! :)
So yeah it not all bad. We had a leaders meeting the other evening and thanks to God we are gonna just have a hard out bible study at youth group, like cos we were previously going to have it seperate which a few of us disagreed on...but yeah enough about being negative. I'm over it now. Well trying. God is in control...oh how my sprit yearns for revival!! How we need it! Please people keep praying. Keep at it. Things are hard atm, but hold onto the hope that Christians...or should i say Jesus followers :) are gonna rise up. WE gonna impact this world. We're gonna leave this place on a high note! Just keep striving for the narrow path. Hold onto your standards. Sure the world and even Christians are telling you not to be so extreme...but dont give in! Flip God is sooo much more than pleasing others!!!
Flip i need prayer ! I hope everyone is well. i will put pictures in my next post. Something random and nice :) take care folk.

March

Figured that mayby if I simply put a month as my title then ill def update like every month. I know its not as often as i would like but hey, i am busy and i need to be realistic! (hmm perhaps i should have made it my goals to write on this..ah well).
So lately things have been ultra busy! I'm working three jobs, (not as bad as it sounds haha) and leading youth group (which i know I've mentioned!) and well those things are pretty much taking up all my time! SO here i am at 1.30am writing on my blog.
To be honest I'm not sure what I'll write. Usually my blogs are rather negative, and I dont particuarly want to rant on about something in my life right now. Im in a rather positvie mood.
Autumn
Yes I'm writing about the weather er season but same thing..kinda. Ya know how when things are real like going nowhere in a convo, and so either party brings up that weather? Yes I'm doing just that right now tehe. Except two things, this isnt a conversation so it cant like not go anyway (excuse all my like puncutaion etc btw) and secondly, I talk the weather cos i like it tehe. I love warm windy days, pounding rain on the rooftop days, and then those days when the sun is just peeking through the clouds, wanting to surprise you with it's wonderful warmth, but afraid of all the grey, angry clouds surrounding it :D Yes the weather of autumn (or fall for most of yous :p). Bliss. Even when the leaves die, I get excited! And that sounded weird but i dont care atm.
hmm tired will fin this tomorrow or saturday :)
So I'm back and its Saturday by the way :) Had such a busy day. Last night I recieved a phonecall from my boss asking me to work this morning. So i was up at 6 and when I finished, I then went to do some fundraising by stacking wood for a local farmer. There was soo much! ah well it's all for a good cause! :)
Now where was I? Ah yes, so am still loving the weather we're having at the mo.Its soo warm and here we call it like an Indian summer, cos its supposed to get soo much cooler, but surprisingly its still rather warm :)
Right im just gonna write 5 things to be thankful for (Ashley you've inspired me by your Thankful thursdays )
So heres mine
1. This is gonna sound kinda lame, but Im thankful for the internet. It's how I keeps in touch with friends, meet new people and fellowship with other believers :)
2. I'm thankful for my family. I mean sure they get on my nerves on more than one occasion, but heck they've always been there for me and well I know they're never let me down. I really ought to show them more, how much i appreciate their patience especially, with me.
3. I'm thankful for where I live. I mean its a new country. It doesnt have like dangerous predetors and heck spiders here are like harmless (except for the white-bait ;) (inside joke btw) spider) but aside from that, New Zealand is a beautiful and pretty safe country. Thankyou Lord!
4.I'm thankful for food. Its great! lol
5.Oh heck my friends! I'm indeed thankful for their loving natures, and their caring souls. I can say the stupedest thing and it doesnt matter. They get me (most of the time haha)I just wish my close ones, lived closer to me (lol bad er grammer), cos i dont get to see them much-hense me living internet lol.

well thats my list. heck ive been slack lately eh
hope all is well people!
till next time, sorry for annoying yous with my bad spelling and punctuation!
God bless

End of feb

Hey bloggers!
I want sure what to call this post and well that's all that i could come up with- its is 1am btw. THis times actually isnt too bad for me but still i should break that habit of staying up late haha am such a night owl!
Youth
Okay so youth group is finally up and running. It's really good this year, which is probabley too soon to say seeing as we've only had one meetin so far, but I mean like the organising is just excellent. I have been chosen as leader...haha thats sounds like some kind of dictatoshhip or something, that sentence, don't you think?? What I mean is, I and another old classmate have been chose as like youth leaders of the group, mainly because we've both just finished school and arnt moving on to Uni or anything this year. SO yeah its been real good, because we've been having like "leader" meetings lol and we've mangaed to plan like 3 weeks ahead of time, its great! To be honest I am finding it rather hard, cos Im not really a loud person, or am I like leader material (atleast thats what i think, ive been told by God and lots of other people, well otherwise) and yeah. Cos like at our first youth group meeting we were trying to organise games and well no-one was listening, there was just no respect..I found it quite idk offending. You know, like this generation is soo bad with respect, its horrific! So yeah this is a learning experiance for me, which I hope will bring the "leader-ness" (lol) right outta me. I would appreciate prayer btw :)
Engagement
Hahaha no Im not engaged! lol I just put that title to remind me of the engagement party I went to in the weekend. It was actually last years youth group leaders that became engaged! It was very lovely...but unfortunately alot of things went down. Im not going to go hugely into detail (that wouldnt be fair) but it would be safe to say that I learnt personally from attending this. You see Im completely opposed to drinking (as in alcohol) as I've seen the effects first hand and I know what it can lead too etc. But unfortunately on this night i drank. Thank the Lord it was only a few, but the guilt i felt afterwards was pretty big. I guess I just saw that everyone else (Christian and non Christian) were having a few and so I caved. Grr im really annoyed at myself, not only cos i lowered my standards (atleast I think thats what my standards are..heck im annoyed Im so "double-minded" on the matter also) but i also did this in front of minors who attend youth group. I mean heck, what is that showing them! Ughhh ...
Could you girls please pray for me?? or even leave me some advice? I really would appreciate it!
well think ill leave it at that for now.

update lol

Hey everyone! how are you all? So I made it my priority to update this as I just havnt in ages! It's really bad of me..i guess i just have been either too busy or too lazy to go on this...Im thinking more latter but a bit of both. Well today and my family went on a day trip to Alexander. It's a lovely little town that goes to extremes temperature wise, in both summer and winter. And so because its summer here i def expected the heat. And boy did we get it.. Was like 33 degrees! Which is alot especially for us, as lately our weather in my town has been pretty pitiful. Ah well! I enjoyed the heat today, it meant ice cream and touching up on my tan :D There was also another form of heat that wasnt so tasteful should i say..my temper. Today was definately another wake-up call for my erm character. Lately Gods showing me some ugly sides of me and it hasnt been pleasant. Today was def one of those days, when I could really see that I'm not perfect..well obvs not..but yeah. You see I can be very selfish, demanding, and impatient. Today i'm pretty sure I did nothing but complain and grumble about how we're wasting time doing this, and we're late for this..etc etc. Ughh i just hate that about myself! Funny thing is however (and btw Im not judging, just merely commenting) is that my dad and my youngest brother are exactly the same (Oh God have mercy, send us an outpouring Lord! Please!!) So today was a great day of butting heads-yay! I really do need a change in me, believe me i see the log in my own eye! I mean how am i supposed to cope in our family ministry if i cannot bear to be around them..i dont like being like this. I wish i was more like my brother James sometimes. He's got a gentle spirit, and just sits and smiles all the time. Sigh!
So yes atm things have been pretty difficult. Another thing is that I've been real keen to just go places, (mayby my age has something to do with it also..) like travel and well get out of town ya know! And i've been real struggling with the truths of this ministry and the fact we'll be all over the place, almost every country in the world...but for some mad reason, my heart has idk..taken it in, and Im still yearning to get out, even though i know right now, this is the "sitting in the waiting room" place...yeesh there goes my inpatient-ness again huh? Like its been hard aye. I'm thinking it certainly doesnt help when friends of mine who are not understanding of this at all....how do i say...It's like I have this huge dream of my life and its big and exciting..but i cannot really share it cos people dont believe you, or they imagine it their own way..and it sucks!
God has big plans! We are living in the last days, expect to see ginormous things happen people! We arnt just gonna be raptured without leaving a mark on this world. As barlow girl says "We are a million voices, breaking silence til...THEY'LL REMEMBER WE WERE HERE!!" Guys whats happening now, is just a period of darkness. Dont lose hope..i really ought to take my own advise hahaha! can you guys pray for me please..thanks! And so people even if this is a real weird blog, (i kinda start off slighly emo-ish and then end up leaving like a pep talk lol) just yeah keep at it. If theres things in your life getting you down, pray hard! And please i urge you to pray for the biggest revival the world has ever seen. Check out Isaiah60 and Acts 2!. Gods word does not return void! believe in the latter glory!! peace out.

Interesting times

Hey everyone! How has the new year been treating you? I for one cannot beleive how fast it's going already, I mean it's almost February...which means Valentines Day :)...which also means hanging with my girlies.
Moving onto more pressing matters, I have titled this blog "Interesting Times" because for me, lately has been rather interesting, if not discouraging, crazy, fun, stressful all at the same time. I think it is definately a heart issue. Well actually I'm not entirelly sure anymore. You see over this past (2009 til late) year, my walk with God has never been so like horrid. I mean I havnt gone completely off the rails, I'm not like out selling drugs or anything like that, but I may as well be. You see the pressures in my society to party has been taking it's toll on me, and whole I'm proud to say I still have not been to a party (and still plan on continuing not to conform to that lifestyle), I have been severely tempted to just do it. Which would mean going against everything I believe in, rebelling against my parents, hurting myself and leaving a bad example for those who know me, but most of all it'll hurt Jesus. And thats what really scares me the most..or atleast thats what I'm hoping. You see at this present state i dont even know if I love Him anymore, if i truelly deeply want to seek Him and His will, ya know. ggrrrrrrrrrrr! It's so depressing! and yet through this He's showing how much He loves me, still. LIke even after all the negativity, after the constant modd swings and the never-ending selfish desires, He still loves me. This breaks my heart. I just want to want Him more...
Funny thing is after spending a week at my dear friend Mels house, I've learned so many of us young people are going through this. We have come to this place where we're feeling soo lost and so discouraged. Our fleshly desires are building up, causing rebellion in the homes, and leaving us hurt and broken. I actually cannot beleive how many of us (including myself) are just so like "anti parents" right now. It's unbeleivable.* We want God but arnt doing anything about it. We want to serve others, but arnt sure how. We are aching (cant spell that word) for answers, but arnt willing to look for them at the same time. All this confusion leaves us empty and doubtful.
And amazingly enough today I was reading my Word when I opened to Isaiah 60. Now this chapter is big in my home btw. My mother has been getting this for seven years (which is why we're in desperate hope for a worldwide revival btw)and so I've been reading this alot especially lately. But today verse 2 of the chapter stuck out like red on white. It reads
'For behold, the darkness shall
cover the earth,
And deep darkness the people;
This is whats going on people!! and I just couldnt see it until today! I mean talk about amaaazing! It just makes so much sense. This is why the church is suffering, this is why the young people are simply losing it. We have been faced with the darkness, and I feel God saying to endure. We need to hold on, and do our best to overcome this until this period of 'doubt' passes. I do apologise if this makes no sense to some of you. You peeps are mainly in America and mayby spiritually you're all doing great. But in my country there's devision, and there isn't unity. The churches that do exist have become dry and lukewarm, if you will, and God has plans of an outpouring I know it, i've just gotta get that vision back for myself. Still cant understand how my mother is still so strong..sorry this very muddled.
And also sorry cos I'm gonna stop short. It is midnight after all and well I just cant seem to write proper blogs I feel, they're never like put in proper, heck cant think of the word, like formatting? I keep going off on tangants.sigh.
Keeps strong, and please pray for me :)
God bles yall.
ps there'll was so much i wanted to talk about but i keep.. yeah.

Happy New Year!!

Hey everyone so I hope you've had a great New Year Celebration! Right now its 2pm and we are witnessing the annual parade that goes through our small town. Heres a photo of the event. To be quite honest it doesnt interest me that much. I'd much prefer to leave and go on a lovely drive somewhere in my beautiful country , but my youngest brother insisted we stay home for it and because it goes past our street, they block the road so we cant leave..sigh. anyway I guess i should appreciate it a little more, i mean vintage cars and tractors are what makes this town.
Anyway people, do you have any New Year Resolutions?
Here are mine (atleast I think these will be mine, i havnt properly thought it through just yet):
1. Lose 8kgs (according to the BMI thingy, i'm overweight for my height :(, yeah i wasnt too happy about that.
2. To finally get my license ( I know i'm 18 but still havnt got it yet lol)
3. Save money for my friends wedding which is in Dec this year (2010)lol
4.Try and have an actual bedtime.
5. To live each moment as if it was my last, but remember to think about God's view on my actions.

SO yeah enjoy the celebrations! God bless you all!